Nov 1, 2011
As I stood on the bridge, looking out over the water below me, my thoughts were unusually clear, unlike the waters of the Ohio River that lie in wait beneath me, longing to greet me in it's cold embrace and carry me off into the bosom of eternity. And echoing through my crystal clear mind, a familiar though rang out from an oft-quoted movie:
Obviously I had miscalculated some things...
Oct 27, 2011
And so, we jump. And we pray to God that we can fly.
Oct 26, 2011
It seems like only yesterday that I started this project with no car, from my father's spare room upstairs and for the life of me, I couldn't seem to remember what day was what when I wrote these things. It was a feat in and of itself to just be able to put the Day X of 1400 before whatever the post subject was.
How things can change in such a short time.
I look at the progress that I've made in the last year (wow, has it almost been that long since my life turned upside-down?) and it amazes me. I'm writing this post in my apartment, after having a great night out with my beautiful girlfriend, Elli and all I can think about it how tomorrow is another busy, crazy day full of work, and family, friends and just living the kind of life that was unimaginable this time last year. Don't get me wrong, it's not the company around me that's made my life better, it's the changes that I've made as a person and the decisions that I've made that have made this day possible.
I won't lie to you, the journey that I've been on to get this far has not been an easy one. And under no circumstances do I believe that I'm better than anyone because of the progress that I've made. But I have to admit, there is one person who I am now better than.
The man who started this project many moons ago.
With that, there will be some changes in the near future. Please, pay attention as there will be a test afterwards...
Sep 20, 2011
-Kevin M. Williams
Sep 15, 2011
I wake up in the morning with my brain in a haze, like I was thinking in mud. After laying there for a few moments, my "higher functions" kick on. First, priorities, then personality. Next thing to turn on is logic, then finally reason. I roll over and look at the time. I have two hours to get from where I am to where I need to be. "That's an eternity..." I tell myself and hit the snooze button on my alarm.
"Obviously, I had miscalculated some things..."
Sep 13, 2011
If only I wasn't distracted with the upcoming week, I may have even enjoyed the festivities more. But as I celebrated my nephew's seventh birthday, I couldn't help but think about my own birthday wishes that were going to be fulfilled in the next week. And it still scares the hell out of me.
Sep 6, 2011
My other family, y'know the one with the video game in the name? Well, this weekend went a little different than usual.
Come inside, it's starting to get cold. I'll tell you all about it...
Aug 16, 2011
I'm a raging procrastinator. It comes with the territory. However, I will be trying desperately to catch up in the following weeks. Some of the subjects that will be going up are (and in no particular order):
My Detroit Homecoming with Elli
Apartment Hunting, Tracking and Capturing
Bluegrass.net and the insanity that happens here
The COD Family times
War of the Roses
Gen Con and the work related
Great Wolf Lodge and Kings Island
Wedding Day Blues (and Reds)
Doctor visits and ADHD Screening
I know that it seems like quite a lot and there are bound to be things that I forgot but such is life with my brain. However, if you stay tuned, I promise...
Business is about to pick up...
Jul 12, 2011
So today was one of those days that tested the limits of my patience. I don't even remember what pissed me off but I know that when I left work today, the only thing on my mind was cooling off. There are a couple of different ways to do that and despite not exactly knowing what I would do to cool off, I decided to head up to Frankfort to hang out with Keffer and maybe get some very desperate stress relief before the beginning on a very busy and slightly stressful two week period that was looming before my face. I arrived at the Keffer's and immediately walked to the backyard to meet The in the back yard. As I turned the corner, I was greeted by what appeared to be a large cannon pointing directly at me and Keffer on the other side of it, grinning...
And I thought my day was bad before...
Jun 21, 2011
What more could a guys ask for? Apparently, about 363 items from Target as well.
I beg to differ.
I think that the dish best served cold is satisfaction. Satisfaction that you've tried everything that you could to hurt me and now you simply don't matter to me anymore. Because as good as revenge is cold...
... the feeling that you're alone is a far colder feeling.
As I sat there, I had to ask myself: Is it really that simple? Is attraction something that can be so easily explained? In truth, the answer is no. There are so many different types of people that it is almost impossible to have one set of rules to attract another person.
The operative word: almost impossible.
As I read that, I had to stop and think. Maybe she was right? Maybe I was spending too much time doing nefarious things to good people. Maybe I really was the villain that I kept telling everyone I was. And then it dawned on me.
I didn't even know where I knew this woman from... how could she even begin to know who I was?
This entire experience brought something to light that I think needs to be discussed. The purpose of certain things that are said are not so much to illuminate the obvious but the inspire thought and discussion. Some people give advice just to assist others in knowing exactly what needs to be done to stay on the right path.
However there are others who give advice just to make a person feel guilty about the things that they say and do. They are only out to make you feel bad, and some times, it's not even a matter of something that you did, but rather something that was done to them that makes them feel that they can judge the actions of others because if one person did it to them, then everyone who does something similar has to be the same way. There are even those rare occasions that the preaching (read: tongue lashing) that you've received is the outcome of something that they wished that they could say to someone else in their past that causes them to instead, as a part of their healing process to "tell you what's you're doing wrong."
But nothing is better than having an unlikely friend come to your aid in your moment of crisis.
As I was being berated for a moment of irritation, another friend of mine decided to chime in, informing the "preacher" that not only was she wrong about her opinion of me, that she couldn't really know who I was to make such an assumption. He then spent a large chunk of time responding to her attacks with unerring accuracy and deftly disarming her verbal barbs.
Moral of the story I guess is simply this: Do you know who you're audience is when you voice your opinion?
Jun 15, 2011
I took a deep breath and the only thing that I could think of at that moment was:
I wonder if I should have taken my glasses off and left them in the car. And then I jumped.
Jun 14, 2011
Wait, maybe I should go back a little and explain how I ended up in the damn tree in the first place.
Jun 12, 2011
Seeing really is believing.
Jun 6, 2011
Who's really following in who's footsteps this time?
"If it's easy, it's not worth having." But is it too much to ask for the ability to travel the easy road for once?
Jun 1, 2011
However, it seems that the ghosts of the past never leave the places where they haunt the most.
May 30, 2011
Then I woke up, dazed and confused. Yet as I looked up at the time, I could tell, even in the dark that I was still wearing the same silly grin that I wore in the dream.
Standing in a clearing in the field was a zombie. Barefoot and wearing bloodstained cut-off shorts, she look as ferocious as I had heard. I didn't let my guard down as it had long since been told that they could be fast, scary fast but I was almost sure that she hadn't heard me. I took another timid step forward and that's when it gave me away... the damned dog-tags made a soft clinking sound as I crested the hill and I froze, hoping that she hadn't seen me when out of the trees next to me, another one burst out.
I leveled my sidearm and fired, catching the zombie in the chest but before I could take a breath, they were all around me. I swung my machete as fast as i could but there were too many of them.
Finally, the zombie that I had been tracking placed both hands on my shoulders and shouted out, "Gotcha!"
I handed over my bracelet, sullenly, not wanting to join the horde this way, but the experience proved two age old adages:
Curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought him back. And the other...
It's far better to give than to receive. Oh well, there's always the next another round...
May 27, 2011
This moment changed a simple night into a very complicated one in a matter of minutes but not for any bad reasons. In fact, this moment only helped to bring a simple moment of clarity to pierce into the light of what had been a very foggy brain. during that moment of clarity, I came to five important conclusions, all interconnected and interwoven so tightly that I couldn't even begin to figure out which thread to pick at first to make the whole thing unravel. I knew that the answer to all of it lay in the center of these conclusions and if I could just make them all make sense, I'd have my path. After scouring my then sleep-starved mind, the answer, or better yet the catalyst to it all was found in one simple statement that needed to be spoken aloud, by no one else but me.
It's time to grow up, Kevin.
<hears a shout off screen> I'm just kidding, dood. Why so serious?
<hears a scuffling in the background> Hey, what are you doing with that bat...?
May 25, 2011
Everyone knows the phrase, "The enemy of my enemy is my friend." Well, I submit for your approval:
What if you're your own worst enemy?
Let that sink in for a second... still sinking? Okay, I'll give you some time. I'm gonna go grab a cup of coffee...
Such is a lot of life's choices, apparently. The seemingly easy choice is that we want the lady and not the tiger, as the tiger is normally standing there waiting to eat our face. However, I have learned that some ladies can be tigers in their right and just as dangerous, even if not to eat your face, but remember that there are a lot of ways to cause damage and a lot of fragile parts to us as people.
However, nothing says that your lady can't be a tiger as well...
May 19, 2011
Or a twenty-seven year old egotistical, self-absorbed, social chameleon who is afraid of failure and dislikes himself so much that he created a entire blog around the foolish pursuit of perfection...
Self-depreciate much? Hypercritical? Who, me...? Never...
May 17, 2011
Okay, so it's rare that a day starts off great, stays great and ends on a great note too but I now know that they're not myths: Kevin M. Williams can have a completely good day. It's shocking, I know but apparently, it only takes Qdoba, at-work visitation and a compliment that's technically not even directed at me along with a little thunder and lightning and laughs and there you have it... instant good day. Oh, and for the record:
When a person meets your girlfriend and while just out of her vision asks you if that's your girl and when you confirm, they grin and mouth the words, "Holy Shit! Good Job!" while giving you the thumbs up sign... it's a good sign.
It's funny when someone does something to aggravate you, to just get under your skin and it backfires. Like when someone tries to break up a friendship and instead it makes the relationship stronger. Well it works with a lot of things, like for instance when someone demands something from you which in turn makes it impossible for you to purchase something for them as a gift...
And they say that justice is blind and karma doesn't exist... HA!
May 14, 2011
But just know, that part of what I'm going to tell you is horse shit.
May 6, 2011
I don't have to like it, but no matter how I feel, to me Derby is a time of change. For good or bad is another story...
May 4, 2011
However, the best laid plans of mice and men, often explode in our faces.
Not to mention that the wicked witch of the Midwest made it her mission in life to make mine miserable.
Eh, you win some, you lose some...
I've wanted to start a life as an adult, but I'm no good alone. I self-destruct when left in an isolated state for an extended period of time. However, even though I've wanted to start a family, I've never been comfortable doing to. I'm not saying that it had anything to do with my ex as for a while I really believed that she would be the one that I started my life with. It simply didn't work out. However, I spent part of Friday with a four year old girl on my shoulders, and my arms around my baby girl and I realized that this is what my life could be like. My daughter on my shoulders, my arm around my wife and feeling of happiness that I got with the two of them around. The problem...
Nothing. All I'd need is time and perseverance. Strange, huh? For the first time, I can't see a negative. Well...
May 3, 2011
After spending the weekend with him, I am happy to report that I'm happy with the changes that I've made.
Well, at least most of them.
It's also a well known fact that my brother brings out the desire for a better life in myself but this time, I already had that in sight and a plan to pursue it. Now, I just gotta catch it. And for the record...
The life that I want to live is a slippery little bastard.
Apr 25, 2011
Fellas, we are not equipped to win this war. Sorry to tell you all this, but it's a simple fact of life. Why?
Because we are not capable of sharing what we think, good, bad or indifferent to the opposite sex. And truth be told, this entire war is our fault.
I will take your questions now.
Apr 19, 2011
Even if it kills me.
So it's been said that there is nothing more satisfying than the completion of a goal. I'm not sure about the satisfaction factor but I do know that I feel as though a weight has been lifted from my shoulders. But, as nice as it feels to have that weight removed, there is still work to be done, things that need to be accomplished. So, to all those who don't know, I have a car. Why was there no big triumphant post about it? Well there's much more to the story than just that.
Come inside, it's raining out here and I'll tell you all about it...
Apr 13, 2011
First things first. Rosetta Stone sucks, P90x sucks, this project is painful. Mentally and Physically. However, good medicine tastes bitter so suck it up, Kevin and press on.
...Or at least that's what I'd expect myself to say to myself... oh well. On to the updates!
Apr 8, 2011
Donnie T. Adamson,
Venit mors pro omnibus in tempore. Ora quod possumus omnes consumentur necessaria qui paratus est
Requiescant in pace et sit animi et animas omnium recessit modis inuenit misericordiam et remissiónem amplexu Dei
Now, with that being said, I guess it's time for the actual posting, huh...
Apr 5, 2011
I'm so fed up with waiting that I'm gonna explode! I hate this game but I have to play it. I've been waiting for someone to handle something regarding the last piece needed for my car and I'm being stonewalled at every turn. I can't move forward because I can't make anymore forward progress without this integral piece.
And the thing that's pissing me off is that everyone wants me to jump immediately when asked to do something, and I try to be johnny-on-the-spot and yet with my shit, people are dragging their asses.
I'm gonna drag their asses through barbed wire if they don't get the lead out...
:takes a deep breath and exhales: Okay, on to the weekend recap!
Apr 1, 2011
"Why are you getting so upset?" Simple question, right? Only if you want to hear the answer.
Mar 31, 2011
But that second chance comes with a warning: Screw me over again and I'll make your life miserable.
But let's start with the cheerful stuff first, okay? No need to begin this post so negatively...
Read more »
Mar 29, 2011
|Alec Hardison: Computer Genius|
|Gregory House: Brilliant Diagnostic Physician|
|The Perfect Version of Kevin M. Williams|
|Michael Westin: Suave Ex-Intel Operative|
|Neal Caffery: Multi-Cultured Ex-Con turned FBI Agent|
Mar 28, 2011
This is my battle cry this week. My insecurities are getting the better of me and I have to do something about them. And what better way to reassure yourself of your own personal worth than the make some BIG progress on a important project? So, with that being said, I'm going to roll a couple of posts into one big one. Anyone have an issue with that? Oh yeah, no one ever answers these questions. Oh well, it was worth a shot.
So, I (think) I have the Rosetta Stone software installed properly. All four languages.
Yup, your read that right. German, Latin American Spanish, Japanese and Farsi. Brain, prepare to be beaten.
Mar 25, 2011
Who says that your video game console can't get you into shape?
I'll be posting the pictures of my before on the 30th of March and beginning in earnest on the 31st. Wish me luck as this is a big part of the project, liking what I see when I look in the mirror.
On a completely unrelated side note, I'm starting to believe that I can make this work now. Maybe I can become the perfect version of myself with only a little work, determination and the support of my friends and family. Who knows?
Mar 24, 2011
To all of my readers who visit this page: go see Limitless. Seriously. Not joking. Have I made my point?
Good. Now, on to the blogging!
Okay, so yesterday was date night and we went to go see Limitless because as anyone who knows about this project knows, this is the movie from which the question that caused this endeavor came from. (Wow, that was a confusing statement and I wrote it) For the record, I thought that was what I was shooting for, to be Eddie Morra...
That would be awesome, but is ultimately impossible for one reason: There is no NZT. Bummer.
Or at least not exactly.
Mar 23, 2011
And the answer is no.
This is not in anyway religious. Well, not really.
This is about people who deserve sainthood and the trials they face. Or rather the trials they face which makes them deserve sainthood.
Let me tell you a story about a guy, a girl and a villain.
Okay, it's a major character flaw. I get it. But I'm working on it... I promise. (crosses my heart and fingers behind back)
Mar 21, 2011
Mar 18, 2011
To all my friends who know me well, prepare to take a refresher course. ~Kevin M. Williams
The pursuit of perfection is not a sprint, nor a marathon. It's a death march. No one person is perfect. (And to all of my religious friends reading this saying, "Well, there was this one guy... He doesn't count in this conversation ;P) It's commonly accepted that it is an impossible endeavor. No one person can be perfect for precisely the reason that Mr. Fisher states: It's a moving target. However, in all reality, that is the wrong way to look at it. Perfection is a moving target because we are constantly evolving. Changing. But that doesn't mean that we can't be perfect. It just means that we have to re-define our quarry. We're not looking for permanent perfection, just to be in that zone where perfect resides and able to evolve, adapt and change as it moves. But to do that, we need to find out what the perfect version of ourselves really is and then achieve that goal. I believe that anyone can do it. And to prove it...
I'm going to do it. I will become the perfect version of myself. In three years.