It's been three months.
Three months since I've suspended my personal quest to become the perfect version of myself. Three months since I threw in the proverbial towel. And in the past three months, although the project has been suspended, my progress has not been. It's been slow, granted but even a snail can climb Mt. Everest. Even if it takes a lifetime.
Let's just say things haven't been the best but not by any standards can I say that they have been the worse. It's just... stalled.
Let me catch you up...
Life as I knew it stalled out in November. Things took a turn for the worse and I made a few bad decisions. My income tanked and soon the bills that I had coming in per month were more than the paltry income that I was making. I took on a roommate to help with my expenses and that soon turned into another expenditure that I simply couldn't afford. Nevertheless, I've always been stubborn and "I quit" are two of the hardest words in the English language for me next to "I'm sorry" and "Help me." Growth however, means learning to do things that you don't like and that may be painful at times. The scars that you come away with are the proof that you are a survivor, and that no matter what life throws your way, that you can take it and continue, never giving up, never quitting and never saying that you can't handle it. After all, on a long enough timeline, any problem can be overcome except death.
And with the advances in modern medical science, even that's questionable.
Speaking of questions, with everything that's happened, it begs one simple one: When is enough enough? When is stubbornly pressing on no longer a matter of perseverance but of pride? Well, I'll tell you.
Nothing is impossible. Nothing is beyond the reach of those who believe that they can achieve their goals and dreams. There is nothing that cannot be accomplished with the proper application of will, the right tools and the ability to roll your sleeves up and do what must be done to ensure that you can survive even the most difficult things that life throws your way.
So even as I write this, I am working to fix my problems. It'll take hard work and maybe a bit of luck but at the end of the day, it will come down to the sweat of my brow and the resourcefulness that I pride myself on having to see me through. And maybe, just maybe the pride that I have in my own ability will be enough for me to realize that I can't do it all by myself and that asking for help won't kill me. After all, at the end of the day, one thing is certain:
No man is an island. The best that anyone can hope to be is an fortress, protecting those that they love while receiving support from those that they trust and trust is all we have.
And besides, what would this life be if we were forced to live it alone: Solitary confinement.